President's Day Bullroar

Why did I have class today? This is absolutely preposterous. The entire school district got the whole day off for President's Day today while my stupid college still had classes. My Lord, if only Abraham Lincoln could have seen the horror that occurred today. If he had witnessed me drive to either of the two classes I had today, I'm sure a single, noble tear drop would have fallen from the front of his skull because he is probably a skeleton by now. And if Andrew Jackson got word that I was being forced to sit quietly in a classroom for about an hour and then leave, I'm sure he would have thrown a righteous and valiant tantrum with his friend Teddy Roosevelt as they sat in the room that they share in Lunatic Hell. If Bill Clinton had known, I'm sure he would have pulled up to the school Ferris Bueller style and gotten me out of there as quickly as possible. George W. Bush would probably do that too, but I just think Bill Clinton is cooler. Well, even though I still had to go to class today, I'm still happy it's President's Day. And since there aren't many President's Day owl related greeting cards, I thought I'd make one for you to present to your presidential paramour this second-to-last Monday in February.