Well, it's August 1st. This is officialy the time of year where students start getting depressed that school is starting in a scant few days, unless they're nerds, in which case all they did this summer was write fan fiction and have nightmares about human interaction and are therefore talking about how they can't wait for school to start, which makes normal people become frustrated. And whether you are going off to college for the first time, moving off campus for the first time, or have become a pariah in the neighborhood you presently rent a house in because of that time you jogged pantsless past an open window as the elementary school down the street was letting out just because you started pooping and suddenly decided you wanted something to read, many of us are changing our living situations. So I've decided to make August a theme month. All of the material presented on this blog during August will be appropriate ways for people who live together to communicate with each other. I can't help but feel that this week's card is a great example.
This is a card that I feel would be appropriate for anyone to present to their new roommate, but I feel it's especially apt when a dude gives it to the other dude he's about to start sharing a dorm with. By doing this, the recipient will assume that this new guy is homosexual, or "gay," thereby ensuring that neither one of them will speak to or make eye contact with the other for the rest of the semester. If you've ever, EVER, shared a dorm with someone (even if you
kinda liked him or her) you'll find that this is useful in speeding up the process of dorm level interaction (namely; outreach, awkwardness, masturbatory interruption, disdain, silence.) This card will expedite nature itself, streamlining the chain to simply awkwardness, silence, and masturbatory interruption if the floors don't creak. So check it out.
See ya next time, kids!
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